NOAH

I can see why the god-squads and Bible police got so riled about this film. I don’t recall any Gorignaks (“rock lobsters” would be an apt description) in the Book of Genesis. But if you can unmoor your brain from the source material and watch it as an apocalyptic fantasy, it’s not so bad. Yes, it preserves all the ridiculous inconsistencies, incongruities, and downright impossibilities of the Bible stories you heard as a kid, and it’s way too long and padded with lots of soap-opera bits, and people have to act like idiots to keep the plot moving, but it’s visually engaging and I found myself tagging along. Russell Crowe plays Russell Crowe and Jennifer Connelly is still beautiful.

FF=2.5

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