JURASSIC WORLD

“You just went and made a new dinosaur? Probably not a good idea…”

Nope. Not a good idea at all.

I enjoyed the hell out of this movie. The prior sequels were sort of meh for me, but this fires on all cylinders. Well paced, with the obligatory family drama kept to a minimum, and the re-emphasis on Crichton’s original theme about scientific hubris. Plot problems? Yes. Continuity problems? Yes. But still, the perfect YA movie. So contact your inner 13-year old, sit him or her on your lap, and enjoy. Wait for the deus-ex moment at the end: not deus ex machina, but deus ex lacus.

FF=0

THE BEST OFFER

If you’re not already, this will make you a Geoffrey Rush fan. I don’t want to say too much about the film because it’s best enjoyed by going in clueless with no expectations. It’s so well filmed, especially the opening sequence which firmly establishes Rush’s character with little or no dialog — pure visual storytelling. Just sit back and enjoy.

FF=0

KILL ME THREE TIMES

Apparently some viewers/critics took this film seriously. I found it laugh-out-loud-funny at times. A whole buncha people — some DIY types plus an ex-husband who hires a contract killer (Simon Pegg) — want Alice (played by the very pretty Alice Braga) dead.  It has the noir sine qua non of events spiraling out of control but lots of farcical elements as well. Filmed along a beautiful stretch of coast in Western Australia.

FF=0

EX MACHINA

(spoilers ahead) Once you accept the bizarrely intricate setup (I suggest calisthenics for your suspension-of-disbelief muscle), this is a fascinating movie. I’m a sucker for anything involving the singularity and this is a truly unique approach. Ana is a marvelous mix of human and CG imagery and, as portrayed by Alicia Vikander, totally engaging as a character. You can’t blame Caleb for falling for her. Nathan’s hubris and self-imposed isolation seem over the top at times, but work for the story. I don’t want to say much more. It’s a quiet film — even the brief burst of violence is low key. It’s loaded with dialogue – but clever, intelligent dialogue. Keep your ears open. Thoughtful SF with slowly building suspense mixed with growing sexual tension.

FF=0

WHILE WE’RE YOUNG

I thought this would be an okay rom-com for a late Saturday afternoon, but it turns much darker than you’d expect. An “All About Eve” vibe creeps in along with questions about personal and professional integrity. I was far more engaged than I thought I’d be. Great performances and I fell for Naomi Watts (again).

FF=0

FIEND WITHOUT A FACE

NB: I usually avoid SPOILERS but this review is loaded with them

Someone (fondly) mentioned this film a while back.  I remembered seeing it but not being too fond of it.  But what the hell, I put it on my Netflix queue.

I now know why I didn’t have fond memories: This 1958 b&w turkey is up there with Plan 9 in the howlingly bad category.

It starts off with a new airborne radar system that’s going to help us keep an eye on the Russians.  It runs on atomic power that’s beamed up to a plane (a B-52 that magically changes to a B-47 and back again).  But even though they ramp up the reactor to dangerous levels (think of Scotty saying, “Captain, she canna take no more!”) they can’t get enough power to the plane – something keeps sucking it off.

Hey, it’s 1957 and they’ve got broadcast power!

But never mind that: People are being attacked by invisible creatures who suck out their brains and spinal cords through 2 small holes in the back of the skull.  One wonders anxiously where do these things come from and what can they possibly look like?

Well, in a steal from Forbidden Planet’s id creature, a scientist wired up his head and created them.  He didn’t intend for them to be evil, but they are.  They gain strength from the energy from the reactor and feed on human central nervous systems.

Somehow the creatures rev the reactor into overload level and destroy the rods that will cool it down.  This extra energy allows them to become visible.  Know what they look like?

The brains and spinal cords of their victims.

Except that the brains have two antennae and the spinal cords are segmented.

Spinal cords are not segmented – the vertebrae around them are.

They use their (segmented) spinal cords to propel them like inch worms, with help from peripheral nerve trunks that act like spindly legs.

The stop-motion animation is bad while they’re on the ground or hanging from trees, but then they jump.

THEY JUMP!

Eventually the principals – army types and the designated female – are trapped in a house surrounded by the fiends.  They shoot them with their .45s – revealing that the creatures are filled with strawberry preserves – but there are too many of them.  The hero says the only way to stop them is to blow up the reactor.

Yes, blow up the reactor!!!

How’s he going to do this?  By stopping for explosives at the dynamite shack between town and the army base.

The dynamite shack???

Ever live in a town with a dynamite shack?

But he reaches it, breaks in, makes off with four (FOUR!) sticks of dynamite and blows up the reactor!!! (with 4 sticks of dynamite)

This causes all the fiends to dissolve into custard.

Whew.  The protagonists and the town have been saved by blowing up the local reactor!!

74 minutes of hilarity.  I couldn’t bring myself to use the FF button – I might miss something.

FF=0

McFARLAND, USA

Another of those warm, fuzzy “Hoosier” / “Friday Night Lights” based-on-a-true-story clones that’s totally predictable and totally engaging.  You know exactly what’s going to happen from the moment Coach White gets fired in the opening scene to the where-are-they-now? sequence at the closing credits. It never occurred to me to use the FF button. These films are feel-good tonics, and I’ll be there when the next one is released.

FF=0

MAD MAX: FURY ROAD

Saw this in 3D. A stunning action film. They didn’t overdo the 3D but I did duck a few times. The scenery is stunning too – after all, the environment plays a crucial role in the Mad Max films. The stunts are over the top. Frankly, I can’t find the words to convey the visual impact of this film. You must see to believe. Since I saw it in a theater, I didn’t have an FF option, but I assure you it would have been a big fat ZERO.

BIG HERO 6

What a delightful movie. On the negative side, it’s formulaic, doesn’t break any new ground, and the plot twist is obvious. But I don’t go to animated features for any of that. I go for the visuals. And this is beautifully rendered with charming, engaging characters, especially Baymax, the marshmallowy robot who’s the moral center of the tale.  I couldn’t help being reminded of the much darker The Iron Giant. I checked the credits for Brad Bird’s name but didn’t see it.

FF=0

THE WRECKING CREW

Saw this in a real theater in Asbury Park so I couldn’t have fast-forwarded if I’d wanted to. (I didn’t.)  A must-see documentary if you like 60s music. If you’re a boomer, it’s about the guys (and one gal — bassist Carol Kaye is a hoot) who played on the soundtrack of your life. Hell, if you simply like popular music, you need to see this. This was how it used to be, how the music was made, and the 20 or so musicians who made it.

FF=0